“What in the world am I doing? I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing with my life..” Journal Entry from July 2012 “It’s funny how they say that life doesn’t turn out how you plan for it. We watch movies and get swept away by the events and circumstances that happen in the characters life that seem so ideal and we want that so badly for ourselves. We may even plan for similar events to take place in our lives to only end up disappointed when they don’t. But, it’s funny how life doesn’t always turn out as you plan.” –Journal Entry from January 2014 “Lord, help me feel direction. Help me to trust you, to seek you and to not feel discontent when your plans aren’t the same as mine.” -Journal entry from October 2014 In the rare occasion where I actually journal, I have a tendency to just write, “I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing with my life.” When people ask me, “What do you want to do with you life,” I have this terrible habit of nervously blurting out, “ I have no idea what I’m doing with my life!” It’s like an unfortunate thing that I can’t stop doing. A little bit ago, I read this really awesome article by Relevant Magazine (http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god/deeper-walk/features/25995-making-the-most-of-the-meantime), which talked about this idea of a waiting room in life. The article talked about these moments in life where we may feel like we’re waiting for something big to happen. It might be waiting to no longer be single, waiting to get your dream job, waiting for direction, waiting for healing, etc. When we are in the waiting room of life, it’s easy to think that God has no purpose in the now. It’s easy to feel like he has deserted you or just doesn’t have a plan for you. THIS A LIE. It is an absolute lie that Satan wants you to believe and to buy into. I’ve never been much of a planner, which you might have caught on from my previous journal entries. As a result, I often find myself floating in the wave of life ready for whatever comes next. But, what’s hard about this is that it can sometimes be hard to find purpose and direction. Recently, I’ve been putting a lot of pressure on myself to have my life put together, which is quite dumb because who ever has their life perfectly put together? No one. But, what’s been really cool, is how God has used things from past jobs and relationships with people to prepare me for life now and God is continuing to teach me so much. I think something that is so incredible about God is that in every season of your life: the good, the bad, the boring, the confusing, the outright terrible, God has something to teach you. BUT REALLY, in EVERY part of your life He has something for you to learn. Recently, God has been putting people in my life to remind me that there is purpose in now and I do not need to stress out about what I am doing. Whether it’s coworkers, friends or family, I’ve been continuously reminded that there is purpose in every part of your life and I am just so thankful for God’s provision. I am so thankful that I have so much to learn from God and I am thankful that he is still working on me and continuing to change me. So, whatever part of life your in, the chaotic, the confusing, the best, the hardest, be reminded that there is purpose in now. Know that God is using this particular part in life to refine you and to grow you and to carve you into the person that He has created you to be. And, the more you follow God, the more He helps you with that. “Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him. Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge.” –Psalm 62:5-7
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February 2019
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